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Thursday, November 15, 2007


one

I fell in love with Israel during our first trip in 2004. If you've been, you understand. If you haven't, I don't have words to get you there, and I'm sorry about that. The tears came as I glanced across the aisle and out one of those impossibly small windows, and caught a glimpse of land. When the door opened and I drew in my first lungful of Holy Land air, I wondered if I'd been holding my breath my entire life. My soul felt that I'd brought it home, and fought with me every step of the trip, knowing I planned to wrench it away soon.

Maybe that's why the side trip to Jordan felt painful. We would only be gone two days, but I wasn't ready to leave Israel. And Jordan itself seemed a dark place. It's 95% Muslim, and the remaining 5% who are Christians understand that to share their good news would mean losing their life.

Fear is the only thing you're permitted to bring across the border with you. Eventually you're reunited with your passport, luggage, and tour bus--along with a strange (to you) driver and guide. But for a short span, it's just you and your fear walking through customs.

We stopped at a "restroom" just inside the Jordanian border, and I saw the only native woman I would see over the next four hours. She squatted in a corner of the room, watching those of us who had come in to use the "facilities" (barely a hole in the ground ... and no paper) and motioning toward a can on the floor for us to drop our shekels into. Her eyes were sad, and guarded.

As we drove through the border town toward a highway, we passed hundreds of men on the streets. Some sat in chairs in front of shops. Many worked on cars in what seemed an endless offering of auto shops. And interspersed between these mechanics were, oddly, men tossing pitas in the air. In fact, if there was a rhythm to the view outside my bus window, it was, Mechanic, mechanic, mechanic, pita man. Mechanic, mechanic, mechanic, pita man . . .

Our destination was Petra. I'll write about that another time. For now, let me say that it's one of the most beautiful, awe-inspiring places you could hope to see. It's filled with color and texture and noise, and a wide cast of characters for whom Petra is their backyard. I suspect those Jordanian bedouins see no romance there--only the foreigners whose pockets conceal shekels and dollars. I loved Petra, perhaps as much for its future possibilities (as refuge for the Jews during the Great Tribulation) as for its current beauty.

But I didn't know any of that as our bus took us farther and farther from Israel. I didn't know anything at all except that I'd left a place where I felt at home and ventured into a place where I felt unwelcome. As the sun set and lights began to appear in the Muslim homes we passed, a dark sky crept over our bus. The moon rose, but it seemed a foreign moon. And though my husband sat next to me, and my friend Denise sat across the aisle, my heart felt disconnected and alone.

Right in the middle of those thoughts, God brought music. The human hands that strummed those guitars belonged to two men from Calvary Chapel Oceanside, but I know who inspired the worship. We sang, and the darkness overhead felt less foreign, less stifling. Outside my window, I saw the beauty of the moon as it bathed those roadside roofs.

Song after song, we worshiped. God walked the aisle of the bus, and we felt His touch. But even in that pocket of adoration, I still found room for a melancholy thought. My heart turned toward home, and all those I loved who were so far away--and feeling further away with every mile. But God again intervened. Look at the time, He suggested. And I did. And then I did the math, and drew in a startled breath.

"Dave!" I whispered. "It's 9:30 back home ... on Sunday morning."

He smiled. And as we continued singing praises to God on a strange road in Jordan, our hearts felt the rise and swell of worship across the world as our church family in Marysville stood together, looked up, and entered into God's presence ... with us.

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8 Comment:

At 11/15/2007 9:50 AM, Blogger Kari had this to say ...

Shannon,
How interesting that your blog this morning is about meeting God in worship. I just wrote one too on the same subject.

 
At 11/15/2007 12:41 PM, Blogger Kim had this to say ...

Wow. That took my breath away it was so beautiful.

 
At 11/15/2007 3:49 PM, Blogger Cora had this to say ...

Shannon, your writing never ceases to awe me. I know exactly what you mean about Israel, as I fell in love with it, also. We haven't been to Petra, but, hopefully, we will go there next time. As scary as it must be, I'm sure it is a beautiful place and I would love to see it.

Thank you for that beautiful picture of worship.

 
At 11/16/2007 8:48 AM, Blogger Pam had this to say ...

What an incredible post! I love being swept to another place and time with such vivid pictures and feelings. Thank you for sharing that special part of your heart.

 
At 11/19/2007 9:46 AM, Anonymous Pam D. had this to say ...

What struck me most about your "worship time" was the thought that you were like this little pocket of God's grace moving across Muslim territory -- taking the land (like Joshua) as you drove through praising the one true God. Who knows what spiritual warfare victories were won as you sang praises over the "occupied" land... :)

 
At 11/19/2007 9:58 AM, Blogger Shannon had this to say ...

Worship is certainly one of those things that moves me to write. I'm glad you felt the same urge, Kari.
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Thanks, Kimmie. :)
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Oh, Cora ... I do hope we can go to Petra on the next trip. You won't believe it. It's very other-worldly. We'll have to ask Dave about including it.
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Thanks Pam! I hope you'll come with us on the next trip. :)
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Hi Pam D.! Nice to see you again. :) And I loved your thought. It really did feel like we were moving within a bubble of His grace. Once the worship started, all the trepidation melted away. He's so good to us.

 
At 11/28/2007 12:17 AM, Anonymous Michael had this to say ...

WADR, I think what you're describing in Jordan is quite simply called "culture shock", when you move from one culture abruptly to another that is different. You say yourself that you "felt" this or that. You might have felt the same in pre-Glasnost Warsaw or Potsdam. Israel is exotic but very western. Jordan is very, very different. You might have felt more comfortable in Lebanon to the north. But we travel to discover, don't you think? Why go that distance if it is to see the same shops, shorts and sunglasses as we have at home? It's a shame that when we travel we don't get a chance to meet many people apart from the guides.

 
At 11/28/2007 6:48 AM, Blogger Shannon had this to say ...

Hello Michael,

You make an excellent point about the culture shock, and about the westernization of Israel. Although Israel itself was a culture shock. But for me, the restlessness and unease I felt in Jordan probably had more to do with what we learned from our guide, a native-born, Christian Jordanian. It was from him that I learned the cost of sharing one's faith in his country. It's hard to embrace a culture that beheads its citizens for sharing the hope that is in them.

Petra was stunning. But even there, some of the conversations I had (one in particular with a Bedouin woman high up on a ridge) saddened me. There was a darkness to the land that stifled.

I'm glad you visited. Thanks for your comment.

 

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